A dear and wise client of mine, Jo, sent me a text last night with a seemingly simple question. She asked, “How do you define success?”
I read this text at the end of a day that felt like anything but successful. I had failed to finish a 50-mile race that I had trained for...
“What’s your niche?”, is a question I’m asked often by folks who are curious to learn more about coaching, and by other Coaches who are interested in working with me.
My short and often unsatisfying response is, “My niche is humans.”
It’s...
Life Coaching continues to be mystifying to most. It certainly was to me, until the previous decade of my life. Folks don’t understand the difference between Coaching and therapy, as well as the myriad of other methods that exist within the space of human potential. And...
I absolutely love my work. Folks ask me if I’m exhausted at the end of the day, having been in deep coaching conversations for 8-9 hours. I secretly believe that most people think I’m lying when I say I’m far from exhausted. In truth, I’m even more...
If you regularly beat yourself up because you continue to do or say things you know, for a fact, are not good for you and don’t serve you — just stop! Don’t beat yourself up, you’re actually being completely normal.
Nothing is wrong, broken or self...
What is the first emotion you experience when you hear the word, “intimacy”?
If you’re like most of us, the emotion is surprisingly confusing, loaded, and falls somewhere within the purgatory of emotions that should feel good, but somehow don’t. So if you...
Last week’s blog, “The Shit I Don’t Have Time For” List, touched more people’s hearts and minds than I expected. As well, it elicited the most response I’ve ever received. Although I wrote it from my own female perspective, men and women alike,...
I’m 55 — a declaration that in and of itself, feels like a radical act. Compounded with the fact that I'm a woman, and a single woman at that, well, it almost feels inappropriate to say out loud.
Most of us, men and women alike, have been raised and accustomed to basing our actions...
Many of us are energized to set new goals and resolutions during this time of the year. I love beginnings and endings, but I don’t love the middle. One of my biggest challenges in this work of self-growth and development has been identifying practices that help me be and feel as...
This is the time of year that Professional Coaches are inundated with requests for coaching conversations. Folks want to know how someone like me can help them achieve their goals. It’s easy to set goals and create a plan to execute them. It’s easy to download an app...
“What should I do?”, is arguably the phrase many Professional Coaches hear most often. High achieving folks have a tendency to believe they should be able to solve all their challenges by themselves. Most of my clients come to me with this particular belief firmly rooted...
Perk up your ears, and you’ll notice how often you hear yourself or others say, “I’m so stupid!”. I know I do it. Far less than I used to, but still, I catch myself saying it in my head and sometimes out loud with no consciousness.
As I’m fond of...
Much of the work I do with my clients centers around cultivating their sense of compassion, for others and for themselves. I’ve found that most of us can find a level of compassion for others, but when it comes to our selves, we can be obstinate and harsh. We expect so much of...
Last week’s blog, “To Feel List”, hit a collective nerve. Readers and clients asked, “How can I make a To Feel List, when I don’t even know, deeply and truly, what feelings I want to experience?”
It seems like an odd question, but if we’ve...
A strange and different kind of year is coming to an end, and oddly, most of us are experiencing the same pre-holiday stressors as we do during any other “normal” year. For a year that was seemingly “cancelled”, we sure have a lot to get done, right?
What this...
What’s the state of your Life Buckets? When was the last time you checked to see how empty or full each one is?
One of the first exercises I introduce my clients to, is the process defining your 3-4 Life Buckets. Once we identify our Core Life Values (a separate...
“You’re killing my soul!”, I whined to my Coach, more than once. You’d think he was asking me to take action that put my life at risk. What he was asking me to do - repeatedly, and time after time - was to block time in my calendar for all the things that...
Growing up and well into adulthood, “How do I make it happen??”, was the question I asked myself most often. I was raised and also had an inclination to be independent, resourceful and high achieving. Bars were not set low in my family, and I not only accepted that life...
What do highly educated millennials and many high-achieving, fifty-ish women have in common?
On the surface, seemingly not much. However, because both are groups of people that I coach, one similarity connects them with surprising consistency. Often, both groups are striving to gain clarity...
Everywhere we turn, we are told that there is a loneliness epidemic, now far worsened by the mandate to social distance due to COVID. Even before this pandemic, the data overwhelmingly points to the cost of loneliness in huge populations with people of all ages. A ground breaking 2010...
Perfect is a moving target, that’s if it’s even a thing. We are so quick and nonchalant in peppering our everyday conversations with the word “perfect”. That was a perfect meal. My son is a perfect student. I want the perfect relationship. Most of...
If you regularly beat yourself up because you continue to do or say things you know, for a fact, are not good for you and don’t serve you - just stop! Don’t beat yourself up, you’re actually being completely normal.
Nothing is wrong, broken or self sabotaging about...
What comes up for you when you read the following?:
“After the birth of their child, Ruth Bader Ginsburg's husband was diagnosed with cancer. During this period, Ruth attended class, took notes for them both, typed her husband's dictated papers and cared for their child & her sick...
Recently, I was on a “catch up on life” call with a friend of mine, and she was telling me about all the people around her who are dealing with our new COVID reality by doing more, much more, of what they were always doing anyway. She complained about their overdrinking, over...