Who’s Your Master? Fame, Pleasure, Money, or Power?

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This week, Jews all around the world are observing Passover, a recollection of our ancestors' time as slaves and a grateful recalling of their journey to freedom.

If you believe in symbols, as I do, Passover is rife with them. Every seemingly old-fashioned ritual is a puzzle piece in the larger picture that symbolizes freedom from slavery.

My ancestors yearned for literal physical freedom, but today, for most of us, freedom from physical shackles is no longer a goal. We can go anywhere and do anything. We have agency and sovereignty in ways no generation before can claim. In fact, we have so much freedom that we take it for granted, wasting it as we do the endless hot water pouring from the showerhead in our homes.

So, why should we observe any holiday rituals that don’t reflect who we are today?

My favorite Passover ritual seems so obsolete to my modern self that I’m self-conscious in its practice even though there’s no one there to see me. It’s a practice called Bedikat Chametz, and it looks like this. We walk around the house at night in darkness, with a candle in one hand and a feather in the other, looking into every nook and cranny for chametz (forbidden foods like bread).

I know, it sounds a little crazy, but stay with me.

If we accept that Passover is there to remind us of the value of freedom and liberty, then perhaps this strange little practice is meaningful—not in a literal way where G-d cares if there’s a crumb of bread in a corner of my house—but in the profoundly symbolic way where we are tasked to look in the darkness for whatever is holding us back from genuine freedom.

So, why do we perform this ritual in the darkness, by the light of a candle?

Perhaps because the habits, mindsets, and beliefs that keep us enslaved live in the dark recesses of our mind, a place also known as our subconscious.

Or perhaps because it’s easy to ignore the hard truths in the light of day when we busy ourselves with the intentional hustle we call “my life,” but it's impossible to do the same at night, when we lie in bed utterly vulnerable to the truth of what is; what matters.

The Chametz we look for today may not be the shackles that limit our physical freedom as they did for my ancestors, but it’s just as real. Our seemingly self-selected goals and ambitions fool us into believing we own them, when they often own us, holding us in their chains and draining away our liberty.

So, what are the Chametz of our time? Here are four that I come across regularly in my work.

1. Fame

Many of us dream of fame, and only after we’ve achieved it do we realize what a brutal taskmaster it is.

All day, every day, it demands that we look good, act perfectly, and make others happy. And if you don’t, the punishment you’re subjected to is swift and cruel—being hated by people who’ve never met you. Yet somehow, they own you.

Fame is arguably the most expensive of all the ambitions that can take away our freedom. Tread carefully.

2. Pleasure

This one is tricky because many of us no longer know the difference between pleasure and joy.

For context, let’s get clear on what joy means. Joy is the feeling that has a pleasant and lovely aftertaste. It’s the emotion we experience from doing the right thing, especially if it requires us to make a short-term sacrifice. Joy does not hand you back a negative consequence. It’s smoother, slower, and long-lasting, like a deep, long-form conversation with a friend.

But if joy is a healthy, nourishing meal, pleasure is simply junk food.

Pleasure asks to be satisfied NOW and doesn’t care about the price your future self will need to pay. Pleasure is a relentless master because no sooner do we do what it wants us to do than it asks for it again, but this time,” Make it more!” it demands.

What’s the pleasure you’ve confused for joy? And what freedom is it costing you?

3. Money

Many people are terrified of money, even if they proclaim how much they want to have it. The central belief that keeps them enslaved is some version of the myth that money is evil.

The truth is that money is an entirely neutral exchange of goods and services. It may not be perfect, but it’s the best we’ve come up with to date. Money is also a multiplier of who we already are. It magnifies our existing tendencies. Money does not make one generous, but having it will allow one gifted with a generous soul to fulfill their desires on an exponential level. Money does not make one greedier than they already were before making more money.

Take a moment to reflect on your money beliefs and question how they might be taking your freedom away.

4. Power

This master is the most deceitful of all. Whereas we pursue the other three desires with at least some measure of intentionality and consciousness, almost no one will admit to themselves or others that they want power. This is because we’ve come to see power as a tool for the subjugation of others, and no one wants to look like that person!

Power over others is intoxicating. If not treated as a servant and a tool to serve others rather than dominate them, power can take away from us everything meaningful and life-enhancing. Power as a master will strip us of our morality, connection to others, and, most significantly, our ability to step into our own authentic power, which is never over others but rather our personal power to create positive change through our unique gifts and skills.

Each of these four desires has the potential to become either our master or our servant. Like with so much else in life, it’s a matter of conscious decision-making and calibration.

In this season of liberation, look in every corner of your life to find where you have become the servant to what you set out to master, and do the work of releasing yourself from its shackles. It will take you less than forty years to get to your promised land, and will be well worth the effort.

Photo: Gil Afriat | Tiferet Yeshua