The Mindset Reset! 11 Powerful Practices
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I love all my clients, but I adore the young adults.
Because they have had less time to be shaped by their environment, they tend to be more open-minded and less set in their ways. They are often more willing to experiment with creating a new identity and less afraid of being told, “You’ve changed!”.
Last week, Gabriel — a young adult client I work with reached out to me with the following:
“When new changes arise and abundance blooms, my upper limit hits the ceiling!
I see it in every aspect of my life.
What's your advice for re-calibrating and centering one’s focus?”
Gabriel has read Gay Hendrick’s powerful book, The Big Leap, and was referring to the author’s thesis which is the following in his own words:
“Each of us has an inner thermostat setting that determines how much love, success and creativity we allow ourselves to enjoy.
When we exceed our inner thermostat setting, we will often do something to sabotage ourselves, causing us to drop back into the old familiar zone where we feel secure.”
That, in summary, is what Gabriel was referring to when he talked about his upper limit hitting the ceiling.
In the past Gabriel would have had no awareness of this dynamic and would have unconsciously (but brutally) sabotaged his success. Once left with the results of his sabotage, he would have then piled on the guilt and shame, not realizing the very human reason for his behavior.
In his early twenties, Gabriel is living with a level of consciousness that I did not begin to have until I was in well into my forties.
Gabriel and all my young adult clients are my everyday heroes!
Here is my response to Gabriel’s original question, “What's your advice for re-calibrating and centering one’s focus?” The 11 steps I take:
- I slow down to explore and acknowledge which daily practices I might be ignoring without realizing I’m doing so. Journaling? Breathwork? Time on trails? Connection with loved ones? Gabriel, almost always, I realize I’ve fallen behind on a daily practice without consciously noticing it.
- I intentionally and sometimes ruthlessly cut existing commitments from my calendar in order to give myself room to breathe. Remember, space is where miracles happen.
- I watch a comedy show on Netflix. Don’t underestimate the power of humor :)
- I connect with nature — whether a walk on the beach or a hike on trails — or in your case a bike ride around Central Park.
- I practice self-compassion by reminding myself that I’m a human being, not a robot. Experiencing ups and downs means I am alive. It does NOT mean something has gone terribly wrong.
- I reach out to the Fountains in my life — the people who energize us. These are the people with whom a conversation almost always leaves us with greater wisdom and ease. By the same token, take extra care to stay away from the Drains — who are of course the opposite of Fountains.
- I get extra sleep and take measures to optimize the quality of the sleep I’m getting.
- I abstain from alcohol.
- I focus on what is literally in front of me at any given time. This child, this conversation, this TV show, this bath, this client, this cup of coffee, etc…
- I read through my “Celebration Log” also known as my “Yay Me!” journal — an on-going list of my daily wins. Because, as you know, we tend to forget our wins and focus on future worries. “Yay Me” is a reminder to take radical responsibility for the good things I’m creating in the world.
- I read poetry. Mostly David Whyte.
Photo: Gabriel Mizrahi Daniel